Repost @x.lost_girl – [31.07.18] Today I had an appointment…

Repost @x.lost_girl – [31.07.18] Today I had an appointment because of my bad blood values…
I was afraid before it
But it was okay
They will tell me tomorrow if my values are a bit better now
Otherwise they have to do something
The rest of the day was okay
But in the evening I started to get anxious how to deal with my scars at my arm on vacation at the beach…
I can’t hide them
What will the others think

Today was the first day without a bandage
And I overcome myself to not wear long sleeves
My mother told me that my scars are ugly later
Thank you mum… How I already said this day was okay
I felt okay
But now it’s starting to get worse again
It still could be much worse, but
Why????
Nothing happened
And I have strong urges to selfharm again
And my body image is bad
And I feel so lonely
I don’t know why
There are so many thoughts at the same time
A big mess
It feels like the whole world is in black in white
I am falling in a dark hole …
I’ll try to distract me
And try some skills now
But I just want this bad feelings to stop

Stay strong💕
(Sorry for my terrible English)
Ignore:
#lost #recovery #anxiety #anorexic #socialphobia #bulimia #eatingdisorder #borderline #suicid #suicidal #suicidalthoughts #selfhate #worthless #broken #breakdown #depression #depressiv #depressed #fear #fight #lose #verloren #mädchenmitnarben
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