Repost 📷 @mentalhealthstigmaa I just chased off a guy I really…

Repost 📷 @mentalhealthstigmaa

I just chased off a guy I really like and I don’t know if he’s going to come back because I am ALWAYS this way with him.
Now he’s all defensive whenever I talk to him and it’s like he doesn’t know how to respond back.
I understand I’m moody as hell but like please. I just wanted someone to talk to. I just wanted a friend because I wasn’t making sense of anything. I just wanted to sit there and that was it.
I chased him away.

That’s who I am – A monster.
I chase everyone away. Nobody wants to work with me. I’m too much at times. But I’m just a person.
And the fact that you left. I never meant “go away.” I wanted you to stay.
Like I want to change and I’m working on that.

I say stupid things. I may do stupid things but really – I’m scared as hell. I’m scared I’m going to lose ANOTHER person. Because it’s happened way too much. I used to cling so hard to people because it felt good. I’ve never been taught how to love before so this is hard.
Please just give me time.

#mentalhealth #goingcrazy #bpd #borderlinepersonalitydisorder #borderlinepersonality #notgettingit #hate #love #lovehate #splitting #iammental #iamdisgraceful #iamawasteoftime #doideservetodie #helpme #icannotbehereinsidemymind
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